Becoming You in Pieces: Why You Don’t Need to Have It All Together to Grow
We don’t become ourselves all at once. We become in pieces — slowly, unevenly, beautifully — and that’s okay.
Some seasons feel like a clean page. Others feel like a puzzle dumped out on the table, with edges missing and colors that don’t seem to match. And if you’re anything like me, you’ve had moments where you wondered, “Shouldn’t I be further along by now?”
But here’s the truth we don’t say often enough: Wholeness is not a prerequisite for growth. God does some of His best work in the fragmented areas of our lives. To be honest, life has a way of convincing us that maturity means being polished, put-together, and emotionally airtight. But spiritual growth rarely looks like that. More often, it looks like showing up with what you have — the courage you can muster, the faith you can reach for, the strength you can access — and trusting God to work with our mismatched pieces.
Fragmented doesn’t mean failing. It means forming
Think about how God works throughout Scripture. He meets people in caves, deserts, prisons, storms, and in-between places. He meets them mid-process, mid-question, mid-becoming. Not once does He say, “Come back when you’ve pulled yourself together.” Instead, He says, “I am with you. Right here. Right now. Right in the middle of what feels unfinished to you.”
And maybe that’s the invitation for us too — to stop waiting for the “better version” of ourselves before we allow growth to even begin.
You grow by honoring the piece you’re in
Some days you’re the strong piece. Some days you’re the tender piece. Some days you’re the tired piece. Some days you’re the hopeful piece. Every piece has something to teach you. Every piece carries wisdom. Every piece is part of becoming a more resilient you. When we can stop demanding perfection from ourselves, we make room for compassion. And compassion is fertile soil — it softens us, steadies us, and gives us permission to breathe again.
Becoming is not a race. It’s a rhythm and a flow
Growth doesn’t always announce itself. Sometimes it’s quiet. Sometimes it’s slow. Sometimes it’s happening underneath the surface where no one can see — including you.
But piece by piece, God is shaping something whole. Piece by piece, you are learning yourself. Piece by piece, you are healing. Piece by piece, you are evolving.
So, if today feels scattered, don’t shame yourself. If this season feels like a collection of mismatched emotions, don’t rush yourself. You’re not behind. You’re not broken. You’re becoming. And becoming — even in pieces — is totally okay.
Charlene A. Berry is a Professional Prevention Specialist in the field of Social Work and Mental Health. She is also the Movie/Book Editor and Contributor to Link2Us Magazine, where she heads the magazine’s faith section.